So, at the start of 2026, I decided to go gift-less. Every time a birthday or festival came around, it felt like a noose had slunk around my neck, tightening under threats of tradition and budgeting. No giving of things. No receiving them too. It felt virtuous – viral-worthy even. And I spread the word.
Last year, I was hit by gifting fatigue.
But this endless loop of buying something to mark every milestone, maintain every social relationship as our networks get wider and wider – it’s a bit much. So, I stuck to my vow. By mid-year, I stopped explaining myself too. I let people feel bad. That’s when everyone loosened up. They began suggesting we go for a walk together, or take a class together. My best friend and I started a book exchange of titles we had already read – a kind of two-member book club. She’d often send me a photo of earrings: “Saw this for you, didn’t buy. Would have looked good on you. Aunts invited me to dinners, and cooked what I liked. Honestly, I felt more loved. Richer in every way. Exchange skills. The best gift your financially savvy friend can give is to examine your portfolio and deliver some hard truths about your investing style. Instead of a present, ask the cousin who kills it in the office to hold a workshop for you on how to handle annoying team leaders. And why expect a stylish colleague to buy you a scarf when he can walk you through a mall one evening and show you exactly how to elevate your own look? Encourage gifts that are about organising a home space, resetting a bookshelf, or driving someone to meet Grandpa when they’ve been putting it off for months. Say the quiet part out loud. Do the thing the gift was meant to – express the emotion. Write a letter of gratitude, record a voice note about the best memory you have of them, film a montage of the things that remind you of them, dress up like a childhood photo of them and have a laugh together. Or turn your shared moments into a quiz or listicle. Gift accountability. What’s better than buying someone a fitness tracker? Offering to oversee their fitness journey, and supporting their goals with a daily check-in call. What’s better than getting someone another set of cast-iron pans? A weekly meetup to cook something new together, eating every mistake until you both get better. Flip the gift. Not all presents mark a happy occasion. Instead of buying a keepsake to mark a breakup, the loss of a loved one, a retirement or a divorce, consider just offering your wordless presence until they right themselves up again.
