It looks like modesty, but the discomfort underneath usually has more specific reasons. In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Chandni Tugnait, MD, psychotherapist, life alchemist, coach and healer, founder and director of Gateway of Healing, decoded the psychology behind it.
A friend says your hair looks lovely, and before you can stop yourself, you reply that it has not been washed in two days. Nobody asked for that confession, and yet most of us reach for a small correction, a joke or a deflection, almost on instinct, when someone says something kind.
If praise at home or school was rare, tied to results, or followed by criticism, the mind learns to look for the catch.
“As an adult, a kind word can set off a small suspicious thought, such as what do they want from me, even when the person means every word,” explained Dr Chandni.
The body reacts to that old pattern before the thinking mind has a chance to step in.
