Having a packed schedule has almost become a humble brag. From talking about back-to-back meetings and endless deadlines to proudly declaring that there is barely any time to breathe, being busy is often seen as a sign of ambition, success and importance. In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Chandni Tugnait, MD, psychotherapist, life alchemist, coach and healer, founder and director of Gateway of Healing, decoded the psychology behind our obsession with staying busy, the role of social validation and what this constant need to do more can mean for our emotional well-being.
A newer, quieter counter trend has started showing up at the very top of the ladder, where genuinely established people increasingly signal calm, unhurried schedules instead of visible chaos. People who talk about being endlessly busy are often assumed to be more competent and in demand, yet that assumption falls apart the moment someone actually checks what got accomplished during all that motion. Busy talk performs well in casual conversation. It performs far worse once someone looks past the performance to the actual output sitting underneath it. Dr Chandni further emphasised that none of this means every person describing a packed week is exaggerating or performing for status in front of others. It simply means the habit of narrating busyness carries more weight than most people realise, quietly shaping both how others perceive them and how exhausted they genuinely end up feeling by the end of it. Note for the readers: This article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional advice. Please consult a qualified expert for personalised guidance.
“ Busyness still works as a status marker for most people still climbing, but the very top is starting to flaunt stillness again instead, almost as a new kind of exclusivity,” said Dr Chandni.
Also read | Why do we replay embarrassing moments before sleeping? Dr Chandni highlighted that the story someone repeats about their own life quietly becomes part of how they actually experience it, almost without them noticing the shift happening. Someone who keeps describing themselves as slammed and overwhelmed tends to feel more slammed and overwhelmed over time, regardless of whether their actual workload changed at all during that same stretch.
Understanding the psychology behind bedtime overthinking According to Dr Chandni, staying in constant motion leaves very little quiet space to sit with harder questions about direction , purpose, or whether the current pace is even worth it in the first place. “Busyness fills that silence before it can turn uncomfortable, which makes it feel productive even when it is mostly just avoidance wearing a to-do list as a disguise,” Dr Chandni explained.
